Girls Can Cry. Boys Don’t Cry.

“Girls can cry”, I heard another girl say this to me. If you are an Indian you can relate to my next sentence. The same girl also told me. “Chee, but boys don’t cry because they can fight. They are brave.” As a 10-year old girl, I was told about how girls are “allowed” to cry. This was not told by my parents, thankfully, but by a group of other 10-year-old girls just like me.

Peer pressure always wins over parental gyaan. And so, I believed those 10-year-olds more than my own parents.  However, I grew up to believe that boys also cry when I saw my father cry at his sister’s wedding.

That incident changed my belief system. It shackled my perceived fact that “Boys don’t cry”, and that emotions are exclusive to gender.

Emotions are emotions.

Emotions are equated to Stereotypes

Most children who grow up into adults and are startled to see men cry. They go through a similar cycle of belief formation. But, I noticed an additional phenomenon influencing this process.

Statement 1: Girls can cry.

Statement 2: Boys don’t cry.

Do you see the glaring difference? The first statement is also designed to feed a victim mindset into the person  a girl or a boy. If you recall, what that 10-year-old told me, you should equate not crying to being brave.

Now, the second statement can instill a mindset of self-definition. A mindset that helps you establish your own belief system can also help you self-perceive your character.

This indicated something very powerful. If the first statement is told to a boy, it probably empowers the kid to cry. And if the second statement is told to a girl, then it becomes a matter of obligation.

The intent of each statement reverses with gender. So, the powerplay is very little about society and gender, it is about one’s personal mindset.

Unfortunately, just like what happened to me in my earlier anecdote may also happen to others. Many other women may succumb to social pressure and start obliging their nature. Sadly, the nature to oblige also instills a victim’s mindset that encourages women to self-sympathize. It allows them to be a victim to society, family, friends, and things.

A Small Detour

We often mention a lot about gender equality and diversity. Some unfortunate women undergo a lot of abuse. And, to step out of it is not easy. Very few of those women step-up to speak the truth before others or to not oblige the abuse. Those who don’t, I feel sorry for them.

But, for those who speak up, I have learned that their feminity is not making the difference. It is their mindset that makes all the difference.

Their non-obliging mindset helps them stay away from being a victim to their own belief systems, and fossiled rules of conduct. Such a mindset helps them take action against stereotypes.

This mindset does not let you grow into a victim. The person inside you tells you, how others should treat you.

How I am treated is my choice?

If I am humiliated or abused and I feel like a victim, then let’s not choose to be a victim. This is something that I would share with both men and women.

But, if you need to put forward your voice, then you need to choose to be empowered.

Stay empowered. Girls may not cry and boy may cry.

Chitti and Mitti

Inspiration: Here is a video that might inspire you to stay empowered.


Product Marketing Books

Here are some of my favorite books that I recommend to product marketing managers. I have categorized them by purpose and intent of a marketer. This is how it goes. Choose those books that matter most to you. If you have trouble freezing on the list, use the reading algorithm.

By the way, though books from the Harry Potter Series, or like the Marvel Comics, Da Vinci Code, 1984 made it to the best sellers list, you will not find any of those in this list. However, it is always useful to study how these authors marketed their way to reach the top.

Evergreen Marketing Books

Any marketing manager, either product or not should read these books to help them scale their understanding about marketing during different scenarios. These are mostly lifetime reads for a marketer. In fact, many founders who seek to gain a deeper understanding about marketing stack the following into their reading list.


Psychology & Customer Perception

Marketers’ decisions bud from ‘how well they know their customers?’.  This requires a marketer to constantly update and learn about the changing customer perceptions, new ideas about customer psychology, models that study consumer preferences and communication.


Communications & PR

This is an indispensable element of marketing. Product marketers should master the art of writing and designing communication for customers.


Product Management and Innovation

The list below is for the Puritans. This is a must-read for tech product marketers. This has a combination of books that deal with on-ground hacks as well as thought-provoking ideas that a product marketer should be oriented towards.


Inspiration & Creativity

Just like any other artist, a product marketing manager needs to decipher how to stay inspired and creative. It is not just the marketer, but this person has to find ways to inspire her team too.

This list of product marketing books cannot end here. Stay connected here for more ongoing updates to this post. Hope you align your product marketing goals with the knowledge that you gain out of your reading. Drop in your comments and reading experience below.

Google’s Search Algorithm is hungry for ‘Keypeople’, not keywords

Did you notice this? I have seen an increase in this trend since last year.

Some of the vigilant, smart, original, and cognitive marketers have already put this into practice. So have I 🙂

Are you wondering what the trend is?

More and more people are fueling less content, on their own website. Instead of using their website as a compost and waiting for an audience to feed on their hidden away content, they are moving outward. Especially articles and blog posts. They are increasing their searchability quotient by contributing content to groups, common forums, digital magazines, and communities.

The idea behind this is that they are not reinventing the wheel of ‘finding their first audience or listener’. They are leveraging on the existing audience across communities. Ha! now that is network effect!

Where are the Networks?

Thought Leaders are sharing their 2 cents with renewed perspectives to these forums. Linkedin, Medium, and Quora have become critical social distribution channels for such distribution. They are the low-hanging fruits.

The more sophisticated ones are those that allow you to contribute either only by invitation or only over screening. They are tough nuts. Mostly, digital magazines and news publications.

What happens to the existing Website?

Some get even smarter. They produce content and publish them on the website. Eventually, the most popular ones get re-published on social websites and digital publications.

So, they don’t completely disown their website but capitalize on the real estate that they own.

But, what’s the point? How does it help your SEO?

The Hybrid Model

Ah! Now, SEO is what most marketers are concerned about. Because it speaks numbers. Here is a hybrid model.

The super smart marketers, establish their content bank on their owned media — ‘the website’.

The complementing and supportive notes that are published on external websites carry links to the content that is published on the website. This is called “guest posting”. Heard it somewhere, right?

This is extremely powerful. The links add value and weight for Google’s algorithm scoring. Helps you rank better. But the point is beyond that.

Google now cares more about the context and community than the keywords you are punching in. A good backend content strategist would plan taxonomies, content categories, keyword intents in a way that the linked articles are very closely related to each and quote each other with high relevance. It also helps people find your content a lot more easily, even in the absence of Google search.

That is why I say, “Google’s Search Algorithm is hungry for ‘Keypeople’, not keywords”.

Start preparing to be the “Keyperson” and be a part of “Keycommunities”, rather than depending or superficial, “Keywords”.

Keypersons and keycommunities
Keypersons and keycommunities

Some people who I love are already doing this. Find the links below.

Andy Raskin

Guy Kawasaki

James Clear